Sunday, January 23, 2011

Dear Daughter

A while back on Twitter there was a #hashtag floating around...a #hashtag for those not on twitter is just a way to join, identify and find certain conversations on Twitter.

Most often mine include #cocktail #wine #booze, the usual suspects. But on this day I was intrigued by this one... #whatIwouldtellmy16yearoldself or something like that. The whole point was about going back and telling your teenage self something. Of course I told mine to wear her bikini every day...but there were some really great messages that were being passed around. Things that young girls now days should hear.

Then it dawned on me...I have a 16 year old self, well 14, but that's the new 16 of today. So why am I not telling her? Because I am her MOTHER and I know NOTHING...I made a gazillion mistakes, I stayed in an abusive relationship, I didn't respect my self, I thought I was FAT, I tried drugs, I was mean to people...I KNOW STUFF...But she would nod and smile and "uh huh" me...If I said it all enough times something may sink in, but I thought a better way might be to meet her on her turf. Put it out there in a way and in a place that she is familiar and comfortable with...Where is that place?? FACEBOOK of course...So I posted this to her page...and here's hoping something sinks in...

Turn up your volume...it's all about the tunage...Cheers





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35 comments:

Cl said...

This is amazing. Here's hoping all 16 year old girls have someone care about them as much as you care for your daughter.

sharon said...

You made me cry. I hope she "gets" it too. For the record, you're the ultimate in cool moms - she'll understand it some day :)

Rossana Wyatt/cdnmortgage said...

Dee,
Awesome,thank you! So perfect and timing could not be better, will definitely pass on to my DD!
I think you're pretty cool too! :-)

Manon said...

Wow amazing...such a powerful message your is lucky to have you as a mom (real, transparent, courageous and most of all loving) although I have boys you have inspired me to convey a similar message! Thank you!

ModernMom said...

This is FABULOUS! Beautiful and on the mark. Well done. Thanks for sharing:)

mrsgryphon (Sarah) said...

So lovely - we have 2 little girls, and the teen years loom ahead. Hoping we'll be able to find ways to share our lessons with them, too. I hope she feels the honesty and love in your message!!

CynthiaK said...

that was so wonderful, Dee. What a brilliant way to say the things you want to say to your daughter. I can only hope she knows what a caring, loving and totally cool mom she's got and listens to your positive message.

ChrisEhYoung said...

Of course i'll be the only guy that posts a comment but that's because i'm a giant wuss. Don't tell my kids though. Oh wait, they already know.

Great message. Your daughter is lucky to have you to guide her and be there for her. That, in itself, is a huge accomplishment. Don't forget to be proud of her and yourself along the way.

CocktailDeeva said...

Thank you for all your AMAZING comments..I hope she get's it too..and the message works for boys just the same...Will do one for my DS soon...Cheers

CLBuchananPhoto said...

Manon- The sad part is that so much of this can be applied to boys as well. So many boys fight with the same body image issues as girls.

Erica said...

I'm showing this to my daughter AND my son. It's so true. All we can do is make them believe in the power of themselves and be there for them when they falter to whisper all these words in their ears.

toddt said...

Bravo! This was very powerful, and the message is point on. My daughters (14 and 16-today!) already love this song for the message, but your video brings that message to a whole new level!! Brought tears to my eyes... thank you, and thanks to my friend DivaQ for passing it along.

TJZMommy said...

I wish my mom had done this for me...so many messages that are still hard to accept. Thank you for this reminder to my 16 year old self...and 37 year old self. She`s blessed to have you. xox

Diane said...

Love it Dee you are an amazing mom!!!! Thanks for posting it!!! I will definitely share this with my daughter too !!!!!!!!!

smilenwaven said...

Holy CRAP Dee - crying here!! IF she doesn't get this now... she sure will someday soon b/c she has a FAB, brilliant Mom!!

@AMotherhoodBlog said...

All I have to say is....Wow.

Powerful indeed. I think all young girls should know as moms we all feel the same way. Great message. Wish every mom cared as much as you Dee :-) bravo!

CocktailDeeva said...

I was reading all your touching comments in Tim Hortons while I was waiting for my daughter...balling...looking incredibly unstable..lol THANK YOU

Stephanie said...

I LOVE this! I don't have children but I am an aunt to forty nieces and nephews. Couldn't agree with you more!

Lianne said...

Your true heart shows through this whole video and I hope that your daughter sees it too! Such wisdom for all of our daughters to see. Thank you for sharing your brilliance!

The MeFest Team said...

Being the Mom of a son, I make sure he understands to be respectful of other people's feelings. I hope others do the same.

karengreeners said...

My two girls are young, but I have a feeling this will keep. Wonderful.

Tamara said...

This is awesome; thank you so much for sharing. My daughter is quite young, but this epitomizes my hopes and fears for her as she grows up. It's hard to have your heart walking around in the outside world - and that's what she is, for me. I always thought I'd tell her to "keep it classy" but you've told the tale in a far more touching manner :)

kelly @kellynaturally.com said...

:)
My daughter is only 6 (going on 16) but this is so wonderful, and reminds me to continue to be open, accepting, understanding now so that when it really matters - when stuff gets really tough - she knows I'm there to listen.
Thanks for sharing.

K_KOA said...

WOW -- my DD turned 15 yesterday and I will share this with her. It is tough being a parent these days but I think it is likely even HARDER being a teenager. Be there and love them for who they are and who they are trying to become keep the lines of commmunication open.

melgallant said...

Just found this via the #blissdomcanada hashtag. Awesome...thanks for sharing with your daughter and with us! :)

Tracie said...

This is really fantastic. I can't wait to share it with my daughter. Thanks for sharing.

Tamara said...

Wow, what an incredible Mom and role model you are for your daughter!!

Julie Anne Rhodes said...

Sheer brilliance! I'm your new biggest fan.

Tammi @ My Organized Chaos said...

That in itself was f@%*^ing perfect!!!
:)

Tammi

Shash said...

It was amazingly perfect! I shared it with every girl I know!!

Karolyn said...

Mine is 2 years old...maybe facebook will be outdated when she reaches 16 but I will keep this video around to post it in whatever social network she visits....YOu made me cry with such a true and powerful message!.

Wendy said...

Just saw this on Notes from the Cookie Jar and had to come over and thank you for sharing such an amazing piece of awesomeness. I remember that hashtag and I DO have a 16 year old...plus four more daughters older and younger than her. I'm sharing it with each of the ones old enough to get it and saving it for the littles. Inspired!

Tina Parker said...

This is awesome. Thanks so much for sharing it!!!

hornz said...

thats really sweet.

beautifulforever66 said...

Wow, thats soo cool! I loved watching your video and cant wait to see you at the BOOB FEST. ahahha(;