Saturday, October 9, 2010

I'm NOT Gonna Feel Bad...

So if you have been on twitter in the past few days, you have seen all the BUZZ about the Toronto She is Connected Conference...

If you've not seen the buzz...well just scroll down to the recipe...

I found out about the conference through a Fabulous friend of mine this past Thursday. I went online, researched the event and thought it sounded like something I would take the day off of work for ( stay at home mom of 4). Who's kidding who...I would take the day off work to park cars if it meant getting a break...

So cut the BULLSHIT!! It sounded like an AMAZING event, with FAB swag, great sponsors and a room full of AMAZING women...Who the hell wouldn't want to go...

So I applied, and I got invited...AND I AM TOTALLY FUCKING STOKED!
There I said..out loud..well in black and white...but if you want to hear me say it, just call...

So now there is a whole bunch of Fabulous women..tweeting and twirping about NOT-being connected and NOT-getting an invite. Some even saying that they "must not be good enough to go"...or "it's WHO you know, not how your connected"...Come on..REALLY?

I have a lot of pet peeves..shit pisses me off easily..But one of my biggest is when Women shit on other Women...or Shit on themselves...Drives me nuts...and Yes..I am saying Shit a lot!

I didn't beg to go to this conference, I don't know any of the women running it, I'm not connected to the heir of the Caramilk Secret. I am a stay at home mom from Kitchener Ontario who works her ass off at what she does...and I'll be damned if anyone is going to make me feel bad for getting to do something cool...!

Yes I wish that every Fabulous woman I know got to go, who wouldn't...in a perfect world. Because all Fabulous women deserve to experience something cool...

When my girls went off to BlogHer and I stayed home cleaning shit out of my shag carpet...I told them all I was a Fabulous shade of Green with Envy, to have an amazing time, take tons of pictures and TWEET THE SHIT OUT OF IT!! So I could feel like I was there...

When some of my ladies jetted off to NYC for Disney's big announcement or Nate's show...same deal...KEEP ME POSTED!! CONGRATS YOU DESERVE IT!! ENJOY EVERY LAST MOMENT!

These are all things that should be said to your women friends or your twitter friends...Why is it so hard to be genuinely happy for others? Too enjoy others successes as well as your own?

I personally think I chat with some of the best people on Twitter...and to all of you who showed me some luv about the invite and about shakin it up at #mabelbliss and Blissdom...THANK YOU..I have worked really hard and I AM proud of myself...

So I am standing up in my Fabulous heels and shouting it from the roof top of George Clooney's House....

I AM GOING TO THE SHE'S CONNECTED CONFERENCE AND I AM NOT GOING TO FEEL BAD...an you can't make me...

Cheers

She's Connected Cosmo...

2 oz Hpnotiq
1/2 oz Chambord
3 oz White cranberry Juice

Shake all ingredients well with ice. Strain into a
Martini glass and garnish with fresh fruit and a kind word.


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23 comments:

Erica Ehm said...

You work hard. You support others. You reap the benefits. Good for you!
If you want to put it in high school terms, hopefully each of us has a turn at being the "cool kid" for a while. And when we're not, instead of turning into a mean girl, we should be cheerleaders (but not the cheerleaders from Glee cuz that would be bad - but you know what I mean)

coffeewithjulie said...

Hey, CONGRATS on the invite to She's Connected! It looks super-interesting. I'll be following your tweets!

Nugglemama said...

Perfect post! I have no illusions on my connectedness. I think they only let me sneak in because I applied when I had no clue what it was or would entail LOL I took a chance on them and feel like now I am reaping the benefits. Besides who knows what their criteria was, maybe they wanted to get people who hadn't been to any conferences, weren't speakers at them, just people starting, but standing out. I am going take this gold star I have been given and run with is squeeing merrily along the way because, Dammit I deserve a gold star once in a while!

JenGPhotog said...

I hope you have a fucking fabulous time! :)

mapsgirl said...

You're going to have a great time!!

I admit that I applied and when I realized that I didn't get accepted I was disappointed. Did I tweet that I was a bit upset, sure. Does that mean that I don't want those to have fun to feel bad.. heck no! This is an amazing opportunity.

Hopefully there will be more opportunities like this and more people can be involved.

Go, have fun, and I can't wait to hear all about it!

amotherworld said...

YOU GO GIRL!

refashionista said...

I applied on a lark, never expecting to be picked. Of course, I ended up getting pick but feel bad now because I can't go -- my husband is unemployed and I'm the only one working right now. We can't justify the expense for something that sounds like a REALLY FREAKING FABULOUS TIME(!!). And that sucks. I need the pick-me-up right now, feeling fabulously frumpy at 4.5mos postpartum and overwhelmed by reality.

But that's life, right? So I'm excited for the other people I know who were picked and *will* get to go. I'll be following their tweets and posts, and I'll be crossing my fingers that the stars align when it comes to Ottawa next year and I'll be picked again and be able to attend.

Seriously, not being picked or not being able to go is just another "big girl panties" moment. ;)

Redneck Mommy said...

Well to heck with the whiners. You go and you rock it. I'm thrilled for you and I wish everyone was as awesome as you are.

suzieswapper said...

Don’t be hating on me cause I make people happy …that’s what I was thinking when I read this blog earlier tonight (The actual words may have been ” Why does this girl say mean things and swear so much”, but I am taking liberties and making me sound waaay cooler – in fact, I may even have resembled The Girl with The Dragon Tatoo chic when I said it).

Initially I thought the blog suggested that simply by airing our disappointment, women were shitting on one another or on themselves. At first I took offense. She was oh so close but personally, I prefer to get pissed with other women and talk about shit…ok, fine – occasionally I have been known to even take a shit while talking to other women but see – I am still not actually doing any of this shitting on other women (ok, once in college but we were just experimenting…)

And then there was the shift when I realized that she wasn’t describing me anyhow – how could she be when we’ve never even met? Because though many of you may not know this I am way more of aTanya, Happiness Consultant kinda gal (yes – even the wonky haircut). Except without a Ray. Just some really nice clothes that make women happy.

I get to spend my days help women dress better save money & improve the environment all in one fell swoop! And - thanks to not being invited to ShesConnected (this time around), now I get to plan a party with some really new cool friends too! I want all to have a fantabulous night and really enjoy ourselves. So because I love to share the happiness: For anyone not able to attend #SCCTO -for any reason at all – feel free to join our quickly growing #SoConnected twitter party! Hope to see you there!!

p.s. Fro those wondering, I suspect cocktail Deeva & I will be bffs within a month and spend our time together coming up with ways to improve a black russian!

marcy said...

When someone is hurt they are very vulnerable. To call them catty only makes them more hurt.

I totally understand why the people that where chosen were picked. The owner of the company, Donna Marie Antoniadis, has been on my radar screen for a longtime. In fact she is my number one pick to hire as a consultant. I have spent a lot of money researching the financial habits of women and carefully built a data base of over 60,000 names of women. I have 2 major corporate sponsors at the table and I have no idea what to do next. I wanted to go to She is Connected because it was a hands on work shop to show women how to work with the brands. I would have gladly paid to go. Yes I was very upset that I did not get asked but I was not going to beg on Twitter to be picked. It turned into a circus and not something I would want to be professionally attached to given my subject matter. I am glad for the people going and I hope they have a good time, learn lots, and make a fabulous success of their businesses. After all we need money flowing through the system to keep the economy strong. I will find another way.

CocktailDeeva said...

Thank You for all the comments..You are all FABULOUS...

I only have issue with those who were "Asking" "Hoping" and "Wondering" if they were going to get an Invite...and when they didn't they took a ride on the Bitter Bus & Poo Poo'd it...and took it as a personal attack on themselves...

Never let anything or anyone define you...

CocktailDeeva said...

Marcy...Please tell where people were called Catty...I have read the post...and the comments...still don't see it...

Every time something Cool comes up for women on Twitter..everyone thinks it's FABULOUS and they want to go...When they don't get included...

They bitch and complain and all of a sudden now the Event is Crap! And only for the "in-crowd" or "It's who you know"...This is what I have issue with...

Pick a side...You can't have it both ways...

Lindsay said...

Dee I wanted to comment last night to this post but the image for the word verification would not show up on my iPhone or iPad and I was not by my computer.

First I wanted to say AMEN to your post.

Then I woke up this morning and saw more on twitter that disappointed me.

I want to be happy to have been selected, and I don't feel that it was because I know the "cool kids" because you know what, I really don't. There are no cool kids, it is not high school, we are all women and amazing and need to realize that.

I would like to think that I was selected because of what I have accomplished. I have worked very hard over the past 5 years to create what I have. This was started from nothing, and with no help I made it into something.

I want to feel happy that someone has noticed this, I feel like instead of celebrating all of my success I should be quiet.

You and I both know there have been many "events" that neither of us have been "invited" to, does that make us not worthy?

Heck NO! We are both fabulous!!! :)

Nolie said...

So here I was on date night last night and sneaking on twitter to read comments of how people begged to get invited to ShesConnected and a bunch of other crap.

Kind of put a downer on the event for me. I was invited. Did I beg? No I did not. I applied awhile back and woke up on the first day of invites to find out I had been invited. I spent the rest of the week reminding others to apply for their chance to attend.

They did the best they could. There was only 100 spots yet hundreds of invites. Blissdom Canada ran out of room and do you see people complaining that they can't go to Blissdom Canada? No! I guess it could be because Blissdom Canada one had to pay for their ticket. ShesConnected we don't as it is covered. I am not going to let others take away my excitement. I am super excited to be attending and that I was given this amazing opportunity. Look at the schedule there are going to be many more conferences ran by them.

Forest said...

cograts & good for you - have a fab time and keep us posted. Count me in as one of those who hates to hear others being bitter & grumbling about the unfairness of not getting to do everything.... and not being able to be happy for other people because of it. Definitely one of my pet peeves, too!! keep up the positive attitude and have tons of fun at She's Connected!!

AradiaOakville said...

Hi Dee,

I hear what you say (a bit of a downer, isn't it?)- there will always be activities and events that we'll want to participate in, but can't. That's life!

Enjoy! Learn lots and share your knowledge and experiences.

Cheers,
Jane

Tammi @ My Organized Chaos said...

I'm not going, I didn't apply - I am on the other side of Canada...
and, I am OK with it.
Have a delirious time, I can't wait to hear all about it - and I MEAN IT!
:)

Have fun, loved your post

Tammi

p.s. Down with the winers!!!

p.p.s. the capcha code for this message is 'poopus' - how appropriate!

~

Cherie-Lynn said...

I agree with Dee's attitude completely in this post.

As it has been stated before- it is their party and they can invite whoever they want, however they want! I had a conversation the other night on twitter and then seen other comments on the side about how people invited weren't being gracious and humble. In my opinion why should they be- they are excited for an amazing opportunity and at the same time it's being said that they only got an invite because of their popularity and who they know! I don't know about you but that's so not cool. The women that I know who are going are all very strong, smart business women that utilize social media and have something to offer the brands trying to connect with them.

I do not agree with being mean and hurting people but graciousness goes both ways. Also for the record I did not get an invite to She Is Connected I will be there taking pictures and connecting with many wonderful, hard working women!

See you next week Dee!
CL

Ariane @fdnstudio said...

Hey Dee,
I wanted to comment because I wanted to make something clear on my part.

I applied to the ShesConnected Conference the first day that it was announced. I applied because of the content.

I did not get an invite.
I "wondered" aloud if I would and didn't hear anything.

Then, the organizers started talking about the goodies in the swag bag and all the sudden a pile of other people who seemingly cared about the swag started being accepted.. that is when I started to comment.

I was upset that I didn't get an invite because I wanted to go to LEARN and then there were all these new invitees who were being invited based on the fact that they loved the swag contents.. all the sudden it was about the swag - THAT, and ONLY THAT was my beef.

Never once did I begrudge someone for attending/accepting/being excited and I want to make that clear to all of those who thought otherwise.

Apparently there were some withdrawals and as luck would have it, I received an invite afterall.

The decision to attend after bitching and complaining was a difficult one (some of your commenters can attest to the fact that I wrestled with it on the grounds of hypocrisy) but I am going to go because I want to learn.

I am normally (As Erica called it) a Cheerleader, but this time I was one of the Mean Girls and for that I apologize to everyone who mistook my jealousy.. I promise it will never happen again!

Can't wait to meet you IRL at ShesConnected and share a "blissful" drink at the Mabels afterparty!

CocktailDeeva said...

Thanks for the comment Ariane...

Whatever peoples reasons are for wanting to go..Swag..No Swag...not my concern...that's their business.

I know why I want to go and what I plan to get out of it..and that's all that matters to me...

Cheers

amulholland67 said...

Hey Dee,

Great post. I am a lucky one and I am going too. I was on the other end thinking I did not have enough contacts to go to such a great event, where I can learn and get better at what I do.

Thanks for the post!

Somekindofmom said...

Is it really about being the cool kids? Of course not! The organizers don't know which ones of us are cool and which aren't.

To all those not going and feeling bad about it, there will be more opportunities. This won't be the last conference. There will be others, there will be more Tassimos to give away, and more Make-Overs to be had. Everyone will have a turn eventually.

Christy aka Freckles said...

I am excited about going to this conference.It does make me sad and disappointed to hear that there has been some negative buzz about the event. It is always hard when an event has a limited invite list. There will always been good people left out. This is my first conference. I am hoping to learn a lot from the conference and the people attending. Stay positive and let's continue to talk, share and learn from each other